A Rant on Modern Concepts of Beauty: A Lesson in Æsthetics

Okay male half of the population, this post is for your benefit.  Ladies you will also find it helpful, but my main point is to make the men of the world realize a some things.  Today we are learning about Æsthetics.  We will also talk about some of the things that we feel about ourselves is completely normal.

Alright, so what the hell does Æsthetics mean anyway?  Well, the field of Æsthetics is found in the area of Philosophic study.  It focuses on beauty and how it is perceived.  Once again, we can thank my Philosophic Love, Mr. Kant, for most of this field of study.  Not that he started it.  On the contrary, that was the Greeks.  Mr. Kant did, however, give us most of the modern ideas in Æsthetics.  To Kant, what we, ourselves, perceive is our reality.  We may find something beautiful that others do not.  You know how the old saying goes; if we all liked the same thing the world would be a boring place.  That is the gist of what Kant’s Æsthetics belief is.  PrettyDSCF0818common sense really.  I have no idea what people think is so complicated about that.  I, for example, do not like guys with beards.  Mustaches are sort of iffy for me.  Just my opinion and I do not expect you all to agree with me.  So, if I say the phrase ‘I think Misha Collins, Benedict Cumberbatch, and Jensen Ackles all have a nice Æsthetic quality to them’, what I am saying is that I think they are all nice to look at.  People look at me odd when I pick up my monstrous kitty and declare ‘My Caligula-Kitty!  What a high Æsthetic  quality you have!’.  All I am saying is that I think my holy-terror of a cat is incredibly beautiful.  Oh look!  Here she is sitting on my desk and disrupting my work a while back.

 Æsthetics does not have to do with just how we see other people, paintings, artwork, and various other things outside of ourselves.  We have Æsthetic ideas about ourselves too.  Guys, this is where you need to pay attention.  I will use myself as an example as this happened to me today in fact.  So, if you have been on the site for any length of time, you know I work at a jewellery store.  A high end one mind you.  I was told I could not wear heels to work in.  Were they obscenely high stilettos?  No!  This is what they look like.


The heel is only about two inches high.  I love these heels!  They are super comfortable and easy to walk in.  That is what makes them my favorite shoes.  Now, these shoes match a dress that I was wanting to wear today.  I spent over an hour doing my hair, my make-up, picking out said dress, and getting out these shoes.  All that work to be told that I have to go home and change part of what I worked so hart to put together.  Just an F.Y.I. to all you guys out there, that is heartbreaking to a girl.  I do not care what your reason is.  If I wear heels to work on a regular basis for three years and then get sent home to change to flats that cause me pain if I wear them on a daily basis, that is upsetting.  Why?  I did not spend all that time to “dress up” to impress anyone!!!  I never do.  Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn what you all think about my appearance.  I will only dress up to make myself feel pretty.  Sorry guys, I am not out to impress you with what I think you will like.  Is that not a bit superficial on your part Becca? Yeah, it is.  No, I w ill not get over it and you will find out why in a moment.  The point is that today I felt pretty when I left for work and when I got there.  Up until I was told that I had to go change my shoes.  After that, I did not feel so pretty anymore.  I know, I know.  It sounds stupid to the male readers, but trust me on this.  I am not the only woman out there that this happens to.  When you tell a girl that they have to change a part of their outfit that they spent time picking out and putting on and getting ready to go somewhere that is like taking a part of them away.  To put it in perspective, it would be like taking a guys watch that he wears everyday away from him.  You just do not feel the same without it.  You feel like something is wrong.  You do not feel put together and it bothers you all. day. long.

Guys, please understand this, for all of us women out here, and I am going to continue using myself as an example since it is just easier to use personal pronouns.  Before you even think that I am just venting my anger about this issue, I have had numerous friends of mine rant to me about the exact same thing.  So, I know I am not the only one out there.  I do not care if you tell me that I am pretty or not when I do not feel pretty.  The reason being is that when I do not feel pretty, nothing will change my mind on that since I am the one thinking about it.  I am the one analyzing my appearance.  I see all of my flaws that you do not and I over think them and blow the way out of proportion.  Chances are high that you do not even notice all the flaws that I see in myself.  Just because someone comes up and declares my beauty worthy of being painted on a WWII bomber.  On the flip side, when I do feel pretty and you tell me that I am pretty it is the best complement in the world.  I feel like I have won a gold medal at the Olympics.  You have acknowledge my hard work and all the time I took to make myself feel my best and I appreciate it more than you will ever know.  Telling me I am pretty when I do not feel that way makes me feel like you are trying to force my feelings one way or the other.  Like a participation ribbon.  Well, at least you were here, you came in dead last five hours behind everyone else, but you were here.

Wow Becca!  Self-esteem and self-worth issues much?  Yeah, I have them.  EVERYONE does at one point or another.  I just know how to deal with them in a way that does not cause damage to me and has actually made me feel like I am a genuinely good person.  Thank you family members!  I love you all!  Thank you Central Baptist family!  Ya’ll are the best church family in the world!  Why do I say that?  Well, a very wise person once told the entirety of our church that each person has a gift or a talent that they can use to help others.  I sew all the time at home because getting clothes that fit my figure from a retail store is near impossible.  Now, I sew for the church as well.  It makes me feel useful, like I am not just a bump on a log.  People appreciate what I do for them and that makes me feel wonderful about myself.  I can do something for my church that not people either are not willing to do or cannot do period.  All of you should find your gift or talent to help others too.  It feels great.

What does all that have to do with Æsthetics?  Quite a lot actually.  You see, Æsthetics may primarily deal with the outside appearance of something.  Nobody is perfect in their looks.  I for one have a lot of things I hate about myself.  Everyone does.  Example?  Sure!  While I really do not like the shape of my mouth, everyone else seems to be intrigued by it.  Not sure why, there is not anything special about it apart from that I have been told I have a perfect cupid’s bow shape.  I was told once that I would make a perfect wife because I cook, I sew, I can do a variety of household tasks, and I am good with children.  How does that make me feel?  Well, I guess I feel okay about that.  I forgot who told me that.  However, I thought it was a nice sentiment.  The old saying that “real beauty is on the inside” seems to apply in situation like these.  Æsthetic qualities can also come from how a person acts and is.  Misha Collins, for example, to me is not only pretty eye candy, but he is a super awesome human being.  He is amazingly charitable and genuinely loves his fans.  

So, what can you take away from this post?  Everyone feels down in the dumps about themselves at one point or another.  Do not let people tell you how to feel.  It is your brain and you rule it.  Nobody else.  Find something that makes you feel like a good person and that you are giving back to others and do it.  Most importantly is that when you feel your best, when you feel pretty and amazing, everyone else will notice!  I have so many compliments when I feel pretty.  When I do not feel that way, I do not.  You influence those around you.  So, be happy!  You are beautiful for who you are!  If you feel pretty, you are!  So go out there and make yourself feel your best!  

Stay lovely and amazingly beautiful!